Adorable L
by Eru no Tsubasa
Summary: Light wakes up one day... to find a seven-year-old L! What happens when he is appointed the babysitter of this mischievous kid? Lots and lots of humor, of course! Pranks, chaos, and fluff ensues! ON HIATUS.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hi, Eru no Tsubasa here. I hope you all enjoy this little fanfic I created featuring Light and L. It is mostly a developing friendship leading to something a bit deeper… Review and tell me what you think!**

**Disclaimer: I **_**wish **_**L belonged to me… drool… **

**Light: L belongs to me. **_*glare*_

**Eru: ***keels over and dies*** Jealousy is a very powerful thing… **

**Chapter One**

Light awoke gradually, slowing freeing himself from the realm of dreams and toward reality… or not so reality. "AHHHHHHH!" Light shouted involuntarily, as he opened his eyes to find a curious child observing him with open fascination. And the fact that a random strange seven-year-old had somehow found his way into Light's bed wasn't even the worst thing… it was the fact that this seven-year-old had L's wild black hair; L's panda eyes; L's innocent expression, L's weird sitting posture, and even L's absentminded gesture of chewing the end of his thumb…

It was official; it was L-overload. "What the hell…" Light trailed off, finding no words to adequately express the absurdity of this situation; this drama unfolding in front his very eyes. His brain had short-circuited and now ran in loops, repeating the same sentence over and over: "No, this kid can_not_ be L… he can_not _be…there's no way…"

"Excuse me, but who are you?" Light asked politely, despite the chaos in his mind. He didn't want to be rude, since he'd been brought up to be well-mannered, and somehow 'WHO THE HELL ARE YOU AND ARE YOU L'S STALKER' didn't seem to be the best approach.

"I am L." the child declared. Light could've sworn he heard amusement in his high, childish, and yes, Light couldn't deny it, _cute_ voice. He groaned. Great. He'd been wishing for the annoying and immature genius to GROW UP, and L decides to GROW BACKWARDS instead just to annoy him further. Instead of just acting childish, he becomes an actual child all for the sole purpose of tormenting him.

Light mentally face-palmed himself. Just brilliant. L pushed him so far into the realms of insanity he really considered the ridiculous claim of the child seriously for a moment. Fact is, there is NO WAY L could have somehow shrunk during the night into an adorable midget…wait, adorable? ADORABLE? As in cutesy chibi? L?

Light was having great trouble connecting the dots, especially since his mind was being disrupted every few seconds with the concept of 'CUTE' being applied to L. Not to mention, of course, that the percentage of the child currently slouching in front of him being a stalker who is so obsessed with L that he is impersonating him is high… very high… perhaps 92.7% –

"You are probably thinking that the probability of me being a stalker impersonating L is 92.7%." L deadpanned, and then allowed himself a smug and adorable smile – AHHH! Snap out of it, Light! He scolded himself. A stalker is creepy, not cute. But then, his stalker theory has begun to crack and fray around the edges. After all, the seven-year-old would have to have busted a lot if locks and other security measures in order to break in. And he'd known no others who'd spew out random but CORRECT percentages, nor anyone who thought the exact same way that he did, thus almost reading his mind. These were things that only L could do, so logically, this adorable kid is…

"AHHHHHH!" Light fell off the bed, and a red button began to flash a warning in his head: DANGER: ERROR IN REASONING LEADS TO SHORT-CIRCUITING; DANGER!

On the floor, Light moaned while rubbing his poor sore butt. "Ow, my ass…" And the day only just started. Somehow, he knew it was going to be a very, very long day…

* * *

A few minute later, Light discovered that the child was hand-cuffed to him, so the probability of the stalker scenario decreased dramatically. While he was dressing (feeling extremely awkward even though he made the L-kid turn around and promise not to peek, which he obliged with a curious, wide-eyed look and asked innocently "Why would I do that?"), Light ran through several other possible scenarios in his head. All his theories were quite far-fetched (whaddya expect, this was a whacked situation); one involving the yakuza and a convoluted plastic surgery conspiracy and several including an accidental overdose of hallucinogens.

"This doesn't make sense…" he murmured, perplexed.

L smirked. "Oh come on." He mocked. "What happened to the truth? Why aren't you considering the fact that I _am_ L?"

"I've eliminated that option." Light replied, annoyed. "'Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.'" He quoted loftily.

"No shit, Sherlock." L retorted. "Who said it was impossible?"

Light had to restrain himself from snapping back at the kid. Arguing with a seven-year-old wasn't very dignified, even if that particular kid was his arch nemesis-turned-cuddly. "Alright then." He announced suddenly. "How about this: I'll ask you 20 questions, in order to determine whether you are really L or just an imposter."

"20 questions… Isn't that normally a game played by new couples on dates?" L inquired thoughtfully.

"Yes… I mean no," Light stuttered, blushing as he realizes the implications of L's oh-so-innocent question. "I mean, yes, that is what it is generally used for, but I am only asking them for the purpose of revealing your identity!" Light explained hurriedly, determined to get his point across. Deep inside, he wondered if L had guessed that he thought he was cute, but dismissed the thought quickly.

"Fine." L agreed, but his reply carried a trace of a smirk that made Light's cheeks burn.

"First question: " He proceeded. "Where did L and I first meet?"

"At the To-Oh University, where we both sat the entrance exam." replied L without much interest. "You know, that sounds like the type of question boyfriends and girlfriends would ask each other. For romance's sake." He added playfully.

"Shut up. What do know about girlfriends and boyfriends anyway?" Light growled, his face burning. "Next question: what was the score of the tennis match we played?" Light couldn't help but derive evil pleasure from this question. This was something they had in common: they both hated to lose. By reminding him of the game he'd lost, Light would be able to humiliate him and get him back for his not-so-subtle hints.

"6-4, your win, you bastard!" L raged, turning pink. Light laughed silently. Apparently this younger L could be provoked more easily than his older counterpart, and gets so much more worked up too. "Tsk, tsk. Such profanities." Light mused. He'd never heard the older L swear before, but then, didn't everyone have a foul mouth when they were young?

"Alright, so I'm starting to believe you." Light finally relented after a dozen more rapid-fire questions that L answered unerringly.

"Finally," L rolled his eyes. "Took you long enough to get that through that thick skull of yours."

Light refused to take the bait, while privately wondering how the innocent-looking little kid could have such an endless supply of sarcasm and insults. _Must be calm. Must be calm. _He tactfully ignored L's comment and said: "Last question: what is L's favourite breakfast?"

The answer was immediate and eager. "Cake. With strawberries. Served with a cup of tea taken with as many sugar cubes as Watari can find."

"That is correct." Light admitted grudgingly.

"But why do you know so much about my favourite foods?" L wondered curiously. "I'd think you watch me like a stalker."

"…"

"Speaking of food," and right on cue L's stomach began growling. "WATARI!" L called. "BRING ME MY USUAL BREAKFAST PLEASE!"

Light rolled his eyes. Who on earth had cake, strawberries, and pure sugar for breakfast? Then again, he _is_ L. "After breakfast, you have a lot of things to explain." He warned the child. He knew it would be pointless to try to get an explanation out of L before his sugar-craving was satisfied – he'd lived with L long enough to know that. No matter how impatient he was, L wouldn't care unless he got his sugar. Light was sure the sky could fall down right in front of him and he wouldn't even blink if he still had his sugar and sweets.

Just then, Matsuda bounced in with his usual bright cheer and a tray of food. "Watari isn't here." He explained. "So I brought you your bre – AHHHH!" he shrieked, seeing the L-kid for the first time, and promptly dropped his tray, splattering cake everywhere.

"Oh, my gaaaaawwwd!" screeched Matsuda, convincingly impersonating a girl. "You are _sooooo_ CUTE!" He then attempted to rush towards L but accidentally tripped over his own feet. "Owwww," he moaned. "That hurt."

"You do realize that this is L, right?" Light asked incredulously. He cannot understand Matsuda, ever. He was so simple, he was an enigma. "L, our genius detective, turns into a seven-year-old overnight and all you think about is how CUTE he is?" he stated disbelievingly.

"Well, when you put it like that…" Matsuda mumbled, red-faced.

"That's not fair; you make it sound like I turned dumber or something. And I think I'm turning eight soon." L grumbled, pouting. And when the adorable seven-year-old pouts… it was all Light could do not to tackle him onto the floor and give him a big hug. Am I turning insane? Light asked himself. Maybe I'm a pedophile and never knew it. Or maybe baby L is just plain adorable, he concluded, as he watched Matsuda struggle with apparently the same urge as him.

_Bastard_, thought Light, just the tiniest bit amused. Did he know he could do that with his pout?

And now L is turning the full power of his 'sad little kid' act onto Matsuda. Not only was he pouting, his lips were trembling just the slightest bit and his eyes were suddenly so big. "Matsuda," he began in a wavering, pitiful voice. "I really wanted that cake…"

"I'm so sorry." Matsuda looked like he was about to cry. "Here, I'll clean up this mess and get you a new slice of cake."

"Okay, Matsuda." L placed his thumb on his mouth and looked small and sad. Light couldn't believe it. Was this the same bratty kid who'd insulted him cleverly and driven him crazy just a few moments ago? How did he suddenly become so… sweet? He already had Matsuda wrapped around his finger, clearly besotted by his cuteness. The little manipulator. Light resolved not to fall prey to L's tricks, since after all, this was _L_. This was probably a scheme to get him to confess to being Kira somehow. And he wasn't Kira!

Light was interrupted from his thoughts by a pale, tiny hand grabbing onto his own. He stared at it for a few seconds, uncomprehending, until he realized it belonged to L.

"Come on, Light-chan. Let's go look for the cake ourselves." L said, and without waiting for a response he pulled me off the bed and towards the door, leaving a mournful Matsuda behind,

Once in the hallway, Light turned angrily to L. "What was that '-chan' for?" he hissed.

"Oh, I said '-chan'? Forgive me, I'm not very fluent in Japanese and I got the honorifics mixed up." L replied, unperturbed, as if he had no idea what he basically just implied. Light _knew_, though, that L knew perfectly well what he just said.

"Oh, forget it." Light said, rolling his eyes. "Now let go if my hands; the other investigation members should be here by now and we don't want them to think anything wrong."

"So you're saying we can hold hands in private, just not when people are watching?" L asked slyly.

"NO! URGH!" Light cried, frustrated. "What's wrong with you; just stop hitting on me already!"

L stared at him, shocked, and then his eyes started filling up with tears.

Light felt a guilty twinge from his conscience, and he felt uncomfortable as he looked down at the L-kid. The child was probably just having some fun and he reacted so badly, Light thought, ashamed. After all, the L knew might not have cared, but this was just a kid, who was a lot more emotional.

On a whim, he picked up L gently and hugged him. L was surprised enough to stop crying. "I'm sorry." Light apologized, and he truly was. This was a new emotion for him, as he'd never really felt sorry before. Making L cry made him feel really guilty, although he couldn't understand why. He was really confused about the way L could provoke emotions out of him that no one else ever could, emotions he sometimes couldn't name or understand at all. This made him scared and consequently defensive.

"Let's go get the cake, okay?" Light asked, and started carrying L downstairs, forgetting for a moment that the investigators are there. This turned out to be a great mistake, Light discovered, as he walked into the room and Mogi fell over backwards on his chair with shock. He quickly realized how he and L must look to them (especially added to the phenomenon of L being turned into a seven-year –old), and promptly set L down on the ground.

"Cake, cake." L reminded him, wiping away the last of his tears. As Light walked over to the fridge to retrieve the aforementioned cake, he couldn't help but snicker at the comical scene in front of him. Mogi was lying on the floor, feet in the air, in the same position he was in when he fell over backwards in his chair. Aizawa's mouth was open in a perfect, surprised 'o'. Soichiro, his father, sat frozen in his seat with his teacup halfway to his mouth.

Soichiro was the first to recover. "I see you two have quite a story to tell." He suggested cautiously.

"I'd like to know exactly how this phenomenon occurred, as well." Light added, glaring pointedly at L.

L shrugged in response, and said: "I dinna know what happened, woke up and was like tha'." through a gigantic mouthful of cake. At that moment, Light was struck by how much child L seemed like just that – a child. Not a world-renowned famous detective; not a mysterious and eccentric genius with no identity. Just a child, albeit a lonely and strange one.

It was an odd feeling, gaining an insight into L's childhood world. L was usually closed off to everyone else, distancing himself from the rest of the world. L was usually closed off to the world purposefully. He was civil and polite, but he never went further than that, never letting anyone into his heart.

Why was that? Light wondered, before realizing the hypocrisy of this question. It wasn't fair to judge L when he himself had also closed off his heart.

It would have continued like that between them, each never really trusting the other enough to let them see their vulnerable, true selves. But now, Light realized, he had a second chance at finding something… _more_ between him and L. To seek something that hadn't even been dared to be considered before, but was now a very real possibility. Perhaps, now, Light would make his first real friend, not just put up a friendly yet fake façade.

Light pondered about his rather surprising revelation, deep in thought, while L continued devouring his cake in a laughably oblivious bliss. However, a thick, laden silence had draped itself over the rest of the Task Force, smothering the atmosphere with an almost tangible heaviness. They were in a compromising situation that felt more like a dream than reality. No one spoke.

"Is anything the matter?" L asked bluntly into the dark chasm of uncomfortable quietness. For a moment, he almost sounded like his old self. Then he ruined that seeming maturity with a childish comment: "Geez, stop being so shocked and frozen like a bunch of stuffy idiots."

Which just kinda re-emphasized the whole concept of this unexpected incident and made the silence even more pronounced as the task force tried to absorb the new shock of hearing L speak so openly and carelessly. This mannerism was so uncharacteristic of the detective they knew, who measured every single word carefully and thus gave important meaning to all his words while speaking as little as possible. But, Light thought, it actually seemed to suit the L-kid perfectly in a weird way.

Half an hour later, L finished the entire cake (but nobody was surprised for some reason) and went off in search of some 'snacks' as he put it. The Task Force had adjusted to the unforeseen event of L's transformation (or adjusted as much as they could under the circumstances, at any rate). All was relatively back to normal.

"Well," Soichirou commented to his son. "At least we can rest assured that the next few weeks won't be dull."

"It never is," Light smiled. "It never is."

Soichirou's face then turned more serious and he frowned a little in thought as he glanced in the direction of L, who was currently raiding the pantries. "Light, he began a bit awkwardly and hesitantly. "I know L is a genius, but nevertheless, he is still a child."

Light nodded uncertainly, unsure as to where this was going. "Yes, no matter how intelligent one is, a child will still behave like a child." He agreed, privately thinking back to the scene this morning, with L alternating between teasing him and pleading to get what he wants.

"I'm glad you understand." Soichirou looked relieved. "Anyway, I know it will be a bit stressful, but you are the ideal choice since you are patient and caring. Also, you are chained to him already so it'd be very convenient." He seemed like he was trying to convince Light to do something but Light had no idea _what_ as he listened bewilderedly. "So that's why I would like you to keep an eye on him and basically babysit him for the next while." Soichirou finished in a rush.

_"WHAAAAAATT!"_

**A/N: MUAHAHAHAHA! Light is stuck babysitting L! (I think I'm kinda missing the whole point of my own fanfic, since it was supposed to be developing friendship and love, not solely humor). But anyways, I hope you liked my fanfic and will continue reading the next few chapters when I update! **

**L: I know I'm kinda OOC in this fanfic, but there's a reason for it. You'll see once you read the end. (Can you guess…?)**

**Light: Eru needs suggestions from you guys the reviewers! What kind of cuteness do you want from a seven-year-old L? I want to see some L-cuteness in action! **

**Eru: Review! Review! Please! **_*gets down on knees and begs*_**If you review you'll get an adorable L-kid! **_*checks to see if I own any*_** Nope! **_*nervous laughter*_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hi, I'm back! Sorry you guys had to wait so long for the update! ^^; **

**L: I'm back to little kid mode!**

**Light: Oh no! **_*groan*_

**Eru-chan: Hey L and Light, can I buy you guys from your creators? **_*rummages around in pockets and holds out a nickel*_

**L and Light together: NO WAY!**

**Eru-chan: Aww... **_*cries*_

**L: Anyways, enjoy and review!**

**Chapter Two**

Before L's transformation into a child, life at the Kira Investigation Headquarters had settled down into a predictable routine. Every morning, Light would walk in with L and immediately go to his computer. This morning was no exception: as he walked into the Headquarters, he automatically headed over to his research computer.

Usually, the place would lapse into a peaceful quiet after everyone settled down, as each concentrated on their own work. What does NOT happen in this routine, though, was the loud, ear-splitting fart that disrupted the workplace when Light sat down in his seat.

A pause, filled with an embarrassed silence, occurred before Matsuda began enthusiastically: "Wow, that was a big one, Light-kun! What did you eat this morning?" He would have kept on going, Light was sure, had he not suddenly noticed Light's murderous glare aimed at him. Man, if looks could kill… Matsuda thought uneasily to himself.

Light stood up slowly, and removes the whoopee cushion so conveniently positioned on his chair.

"Light unobservant-ness decreases his chance of being Kira by one percent." L commented delightedly, unable to suppress a giggle.

Thoroughly humiliated, Light turned to face the naughty prankster and threateningly took a step towards him. Quick as a flash, L unlocked the handcuffs and slid out of them, running to the door. "Na, nana na na, you can't catch me!" L teased in a singsong voice, and then ran outside into the hallway.

Pissed beyond belief, Light forgot the other investigators and made for the door as well, slipping the handcuffs from his own wrist. "You little –" he growled, consumed by a desire to capture the mischievous kid for revenge.

He ran out the door, leaving behind a shocked silence. Soichirou shrugged at the speechless investigators. "Oh well. Kids will be kids."

Meanwhile, in the hallway, Light concluded that the tiny legs of the L-kid could actually carry him much faster than he'd thought, for L was nowhere in sight.

As fast as it had come, his anger evaporated. In its place was only worry, as much as Light hated to admit that. The Headquarters is huge and dangerous for a seven-year-old, and worse: what if he'd gone _outside_?

Light tried to reassure himself that L would be smart enough to navigate the Headquarters safely, like his old self. And he probably wouldn't have gone outside, anyways. Before, the L that Light knew wouldn't have gone outside if you begged him, preferring to stay inside and work. That must be why his skin is so pale, he decided.

Choosing to search inside the building first, Light was meticulous in his examination: no room escaped his careful observations. But as he gone through most of the rooms and there was still no sign of L, he began to panic slightly. Oh god, what if something had happened to L?

He burst out of the building, his stomach knotting with worry. It was raining, but he barely noticed, urgently scanning for the L-kid. Almost immediately he saw him, standing in the rain and making no attempt to shield himself from the downpour.

A tide of emotions hit him, a mixture of anger, relief, happiness, and worry.

"What possessed you to stand out here in the rain for almost an hour?" asked Light, grabbing L's shoulders tightly after he ran over to him.

L blinked up at him with his wide eyes. "I was waiting for you to come." He replied illogically.

"Why did you think I would come for you?" Light snapped.

L didn't answer, instead replacing Light's question with a question of his own. "Why _did_ you come for me?"

Light was taken aback, because honestly, he didn't know. He didn't know why he'd reacted so strongly or cared so much about L at all. "You're my responsibility, that's all." He replied, avoiding L's eyes.

"Oh" L looked down, and at that moment, he seemed so forlorn and sad.

"Come on, let's go inside." Light told L, ignoring the painful pull at his heart to see L like this. He offered L his hand instinctively, and L took it without a word. Together, they began their way back to the Headquarters.

As they walked inside though, Light noticed that L was shivering violently. His worry resurfaced and he stopped abruptly. "Are you okay?" he asked softly, concerned.

"Ye-ah, I-I'm fi-ne." L replied, his teeth chattering with cold. It was obvious he was not okay: his lips were blue and he couldn't seem to stop shivering.

"_Why_ did you decide to stay outside in the rain?" Light snapped, his concern making him short-tempered. L didn't answer, only closed his eyes and shivered more violently.

"You're sick." Light murmured, feeling the child's forehead. It was burning hot. Impulsively, he scooped L up with ease and carried him to their room, setting him down comfortably on the bed.

"Stay here and don't move, alright?" Light said sternly, although he doubted that L could go far anyway in this condition.

"No… but I'm fine…" L protested weakly, more for the sake of childish denial than actually protesting. Light ignored him and grabbed the phone urgently. Dialing Watari's number, he shifted from foot to foot impatiently as he waited.

"_Watari is not available at the moment. Would you like to leave a message?" _came the response. Hissing in frustration, Light dropped the phone angrily on the table. This doesn't make sense… Watari was always there… why wasn't he here when L needed him the most?

Knowing that the other investigation members would know no more than him in terms of medical knowledge, he cursed. He could tell that L was running a very high fever and that he needed to do something fast… or it could end up really dangerous for L. But he only knew the basics of dealing with a fever: blankets to sweat the fever out, cold towel on the forehead, and cold medicine if he could find some.

He started to walk towards the cupboards in hope of some cold medicine, but a tiny hand grabbed onto the hack of his shirt. The grip was surprisingly strong considering L's weak state, and Light stopped, reluctant to cause the sick child any distress.

"No… don't leave me…" L whispered deliriously, his face flushed from the fever.

"I won't." Light promised. "I'm just going to get you some medicine, alright?"

"No, no medicine!" L shrieked suddenly. "I don't like medicine, I'm not sick!"

Startled, Light tried to comfort the feverish child. "Shh." He soothed gently. "I'll get you some strawberry-flavoured medicine." There _could_ very well be strawberry-flavoured medicine, in fact, since he'd noticed that Watari always seemed to get everything in strawberry flavour when it came to the weird genius.

"No, I don't want that…" L whispered back, his voice hoarse. "I want Light-kun to stay… and keep away the monsters."

"There are no monsters, L." Light tried to convince him.

"Can't you see them? Monsters are hiding in the shadows and waiting to eat me if you leave." L held on more tightly to Light.

Light said nothing, because he knew he couldn't reason with L in this state. The delirious child will not be persuaded by logic, because he was locked in his own terrifying world.

"I heard that _light_ will keep away the monsters, because they do not like _light._" L murmured, managing a half-smile as he looked up at Light. "You won't let Kira kill me, will you?" Those dark, dark eyes pierced right through him, and Light was amazed that L could still do that even through the haze of his delirium.

"No, I'll protect you from Kira." Light promised again. "I won't let Kira harm you at all."

"Thank you." replied L. "Cuz Kira is an evil monster."

Light turned around and wordlessly embraced L, holding his in his lap comfortingly. L snuggled closer to him, and after a while, his eyes began to close. Light looked down at the sleeping child in his arms and smiled slightly. But he knew that he still needed to find the cold medicine because L's fever was in a dangerous stage.

He set L down as gently as he could onto the bed. L stirred a bit but didn't wake up. Light walked quietly to the cupboards and rummaged through it efficiently. There was indeed strawberry-flavoured cold medicine stacked in a neat pile at the back of the shelves. He smiled. Watari always thinks of everything.

Light gently shook L half-awake and made him swallow the medicine, but let him fall back asleep right after. He placed a damp cloth to L's forehead and covered with three layers of blankets. Unable to think of anything else to do, Light sat down gingerly at the side of the bed and watched the L-kid. He was in a fitful sleep; tossing and turning uncomfortably. His wild black hair was damp and sweaty from his fever and a few stray locks hung over his eyes messily.

Absentmindedly, Light reached over to brush the stray locks away from L's face. He studied the sleeping child with conflicted feelings. This was the person who'd accused him of being Kira, but he is also the one who trusts him wholeheartedly. What did he really feel for him?

For the entire day, Light stayed by the child's side, occasionally whispering soothingly when L had a nightmare and cried out in his sleep. Strangely, he didn't feel hungry at all, for L's sickness had made him so worried he feared that he might throw up if he tried to eat. Besides, he knew he couldn't leave L's side, in case something happens.

By 11 o'clock at night, L's fever had dropped out of critical danger and some of the tension Light had been building up finally left him. The stress of the entire day added to his fatigue, and before he realized, he drifted off into an uneasy sleep as well.

The next morning, Light was unceremoniously woken up by the impatient poking of L. "Wake up, sleepyhead!" L called. Blearily, Light raised his head up from where he'd dozed off and was greeted by the cheerful sight of a bright and happy L.

"All better now?" Light asked sleepily, unable to resist a smile. L's cheerfulness was contagious.

"Yep," L replied happily. "Thank you to Light-kun for taking care of me." He added.

"It was nothing." Light said, suddenly embarrassed. "You shouldn't go to work today." He changed the subject abruptly.

"Why not?" L pouted. Light couldn't help but think how strange it was to talk about 'work' with a seven-year-old.

"Because you need a break to recover from your sickness, that's why." explained Light patiently.

"Oh. I see." said L. Then he perked up. "I know! We can go play outside!"

"Well... You are supposed to rest..." Light considered uncertainly.

"Pweeease? Pwetty pwetty pwease?" L pleaded, his eyes wide and pitiful.

"Well..." Light wavered in the face of L's sad-little-kid-act. "I suppose we could go relax and have some fun outside." he relented finally.

"YAY! You're the best, Light-kun!" L jumped up and down excitedly. Light couldn't believe that _L _was actually begging to go outside, and that he was actually letting him. What is wrong with the world today...?

Half an hour later, Light began to regret his decision as he trudged miserably through puddles and piles of mud. L, beside him, seemed to be having fun though. He giggled as he jumped into the puddles, splashing himself and Light thoroughly.

"AHHH!" shouted Light as a particularly big clump of mud struck him right in the face. L giggled helplessly.

"Sorry... You're just so funny." he laughed. "Want me to make you a mud pie?" Without waiting for an answer he promptly sat down in the mud, making his baggy jeans completely dirty. Light had no choice but to watch as L slopped together a messy pile of... mess. Which he proudly proclaimed as his masterpiece of cake.

The entire day passed in a chaotic blur, and Light gave up completely on his quest to stay clean. The reason was simple: it was just impossible with L around. Without this worry, Light actually managed to have fun as he accompanied L, who was equally dirty and muddy.

At the end of the day, Light realized he'd forgotten to take one thing into consideration though: L + mud = dirty mess, L + dirty mess = bath, L + bath...

LIGHT HAD TO GIVE L A BATH! "AHHHHHH!" Light screamed in horror.

"What's wrong, Light-kun?" L asked him curiously.

"Ngng..." he moaned in reply. "Just thinking about... your bath..."

"Oh, that." L said, eyes clearing. "I want a bubble bath!" he told him, grinning. Apparently he'd found nothing wrong with the idea of having Light bathe him, but Light found plenty. For one thing, it was just plain awkward... for another, L was in a way his _boss. _

Light made a point of looking everywhere but at L as the little kid undressed without hesitation. Still staring fixedly at a crack in the ceiling, he prepared the foamy bubble bath and waited for L to get in.

"Come on Light." L's voice interrupted his thoughts. "You can bathe at the same time as me."

Light choked. "Wh-what?"

"Yeah, it'd be fun and it'd save time too." L explained as if it was perfectly obvious.

Light was flummoxed. Did the innocent-sounding kid know the implication of his offer? "N-no thank you." he stuttered helplessly.

L pouted and tried his cute face trick again, but Light still refused. The thought was just too disturbing.

"Aw, Light-kun is no fun." L gave up finally and climbed into the bathtub.

Light scrubbed him down quickly, blushing in embarrassment as he reached... _that part._ L noticed, of course, and teased him slyly: "Does it make you feel funny – down there, Light-kun?"

Light turned seven shades of crimson before he managed to tell the kid to shut up. After helping L change into his pyjamas, Light wished fervently that he could forget about the whole mortifying experience. That night, he fell into a deep, exhausted sleep, the whoopee cushion incident completely forgotten.

A mistake, as it turned out. He should have remembered that L was evil...EVIL...

The next morning, he woke up, brushed, and changed in a sleepy daze, barely aware of his surroundings. He was followed by a nagging feeling that something was not quite right, but he ignored it. The moment he walked into the investigation room, however, he _knew_ that something was wrong – everyone was staring at him.

Matsuda finally spoke up. "Uh – that's nice artwork there on your face."

Light instantly realized what had happened. "Pass me a mirror." he commanded furiously. Silently, Mogi took out a small mirror and gave it to Light.

Light couldn't suppress a gasp of outrage at what he saw on his face. It was... a horrendous mess. Colourful lipstick gave him a French moustache, tipped up at the ends. A combination of whipped cream and shaving cream was artistically arranged on his face to form a fluffy Santa Claus-like beard and eyebrows. A ring of mascara was smudged heavily around his entire left eye, resulting in a simulation of a black eye. Sickly polka dots were splattered all over his face, achieved by using dark purple nail polish. On top of that, his face was a bright GREEN!

L giggled. Matsuda snorted. Mogi smiled. Aizawa chuckled. In the end, even his dad gave up his pokerface and joined in laughing. Light stormed to the washroom in fury. That did it. The little prankster asked for it... THIS WAS WAR!

**Eru-chan: MUAHAHAHAHA! I'm gonna have so much fun getting them to prank each other! **

**Light: **_*runs around holding a sword* _**PRANK WAR!**

**L: **_*sweatdrops*_

**Eru-chan: I'd love your suggestions for pranks! Tell me in your reviews!**

**L: Next chappy: the PRANK WAR commences! Be on the lookout for it!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:**_*peeks out from behind a desk*_** Hi everyone! Long time no see! **_*tries to duck avalanche of rotten tomatoes*_

**Readers:**** BOO!**

**Eru-chan:**_*embarrassed smile*_** Very very sorry for the past two months of no updates! I know I'm very late! **_*begs for forgiveness by groveling on the floor* _

**But seriously, I'm extremely touched that there are actually people out there who care about what happens to my story. Thanks you to all my readers, reviewers, and those who added this story to their ****favourite**** and alert lists! You guys rock! You motivate me to write… if no one cared about my story, I probably wouldn't have felt motivated to go on. **

**Also, thank you to those who gave me suggestions for the prank war; even if they weren't used, they were very much appreciated. Thank you! And last but not least, special thanks to Venom-Loves-BB, who PM'd me more than once to guilt me into writing faster! Without Venom-Loves-BB, this chappy might've been posted even later! **

**L:**** And to apologize for the lateness, Eru-chan has made this chappy extra long (her fingers hurt from writing it because she actually uses the old-fashioned pencil and paper method). There's even a bonus scene at the end so look out for it!**

**Eru-chan:**_*in tears*_** AWW… L! I didn't know you cared! How sweet! **

**Light:**** Enough, get to the story! Don't make the readers wait any longer! **

**L:**** Enjoy and review! XD**

**Disclaimer:**** I actually wrote Death Note at the beginning… but they fired me because I was always late to hand in my work and missed my deadline so they got someone else instead. ...Now who believed that? **_*Silence. Cricket cricket.*_** Yeah that's what I thought.**

**Chapter Three**

IT WAS WAR!

But even in the midst of a prank war, Light didn't lose his head. Instead he carefully considered several courses of action and plotted them out through logic and reasoning.

His reasoning went like so: first, deduct what is most likely to irritate L, and second, make an elaborate plan that would never fail. Quite basic, really. Somehow, the thought of inflicting mental torture upon the young genius gave him so much pleasure he began to smirk sadistically.

His inner, diabolical musings were interrupted by a slightly nervous-sounding Matsuda. "Um… Light? Are you alright? You look kinda spaced-out." There was just something slightly creepy about the way Light smiled, Matsuda thought, a shiver running up his spine. Especially with the smeared artwork on his face, not yet rinsed off. For the first time, he realized how clowns could seem creepy. Light was so… unnerving. He swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry.

"Hm? Oh, yes, I'm perfectly fine, thanks for asking." He replied politely, wiping the smirk off his face with some difficulty. But a certain weird genius won't be, when I'm finished with him, he added silently. It was eerily perfect how L had gotten rid of the handcuffs this morning, claiming they were inconvenient. That was true, Light reflected: It would have been really inconvenient for his to prepare his pranks without the handcuffs. L had unwittingly given his freedom to plan his downfall…

Although he wasn't going to kill L, or anything like that, of course. Light blinked. He couldn't even imagine doing that. No, he was just going to have some fun torturing the poor L-kid a bit, that's all. Considering the pain and humiliation the devious seven-year old had laid on him, he found the idea of revenge only fair. It was justice!

The first prank was simple, but genius in its simplicity. It was a classic, and Light was going to use it to its full potential.

He was going to switch the sugar and salt. Okay, so perhaps it wasn't as complex and detailed as most of his other devious schemes, but it was too tempting to pass up. He could already imagine L gagging on a sip of salty tea, choking and attempting to spit out the disgusting concoction…

Matsuda was the unfortunate witness to another maniacal, evil grin emerging on Light's face. He couldn't suppress a shudder and decided to stay away from Light for a while… far, far away…

By the time L demanded his daily morning tea, Light was ready to put his plan into action. Actually, there wasn't much of a plan: he had merely crystallized a large amount of salt into sugar-cube look-alikes. In fact, they were perfect in their measurements and exact to the last milligram. Light was always meticulous in his schemes. He then carefully replaced L's sugar cubes in the cupboards with these salty forgeries, hid the actual sugar cubes under the kitchen floor tiles under the stove, where no one would likely search, and waited in delighted anticipation for L to stumble upon them.

"Watari! Get me some tea, with sugar!" L called impatiently.

"I don't think Watari came today either." Aizawa spoke up hesitantly.

L frowned a bit and said with a discouraged pout: "Fine, Aizawa, you can get my tea and sugar instead."

Aizawa stood resignedly and followed L's orders. L was so childish sometimes… especially now, since he's actually a child.

MUAHAHAHAHA! Light silently laughed. Now I'll get my revenge! I don't care if you're adorable – well, maybe I do – but you're still in for a rough day!

Meanwhile, Aizawa had returned with L's tea and a whole bag of _supposed _sugar cubes. L accepted them without looking, popping the bag open as he retrieved five cubes at once.

Light watched the L-kid out of the corner of his eyes as he hunched over, pretending to be absorbed in his work. I reality, he wouldn't have missed L's reaction for the world. And with his peripheral vision, he observed with mounting excitement as L pushed the stacked sugar – or salt – cube tower in to his tea with a plop and raise it closer and closer to his lips…

_And drank it._

"AIEEEEEEEEEE!" L's shriek tore through the workplace as he simultaneously coughed and sprayed the revolting liquid at an unfortunate Soichirou, who just happened to be sitting at the wrong place at the wrong time. The chief of police gaped, shocked, at his drenched hair and ruined outfit, while the others looked on, trying to fight the urge to burst out laughing uncontrollably at the hilarious scene.

Light couldn't contain his delighted laughter. Oh, how he wished he had a camera… L's reaction was priceless. Simply priceless.

* * *

Of course L couldn't let Light get away with the salt incident. The two were eerily similar in this aspect: they had to win, mo matter what. Light understood this, and he knew L too well to not be suspicious of L's every more, in case he managed to pull a prank on him somehow. Call him paranoid, but he knew L was an opponent to watch out for, kid or not.

The entire morning he was edgy and nervous, flinching at any sudden movement. But L didn't seem to plan anything, as the only time he even left his seat was to walk to Light and lean over his shoulder to read his report for a few seconds. He couldn't possibly have done anything during that time, Light told himself a bit uncertainly.

But then he began to be aware of muffled snickers and muted giggles whenever he got up to grab some paper or hand in a report. He glared, confused and frustrated, but the quiet merriment at his expense did not cease. He was sure he washed L's entire so-called masterpiece off his face, he thought, raising a hand to his face self-consciously. So what could it be?

Five minutes later, his answer came in the form of a well-aimed kick at his rear, performed by an enthusiastically grinning Matsuda. "OWWWWW!" he howled, clutching his poor, much-abused ass protectively. It had not fully recovered from the hard fall out of bed two days ago yet, and this swift hick in the behind added insult to injury.

Everyone roared with laughter as Light hopped around in pain. After all, who could keep a straight face at the sight of the calm and collected genius hopping about, clutching his sore bottom?

"Matsuda!" Light yelled in fury. "What the f*cking hell was that for?" He advanced threateningly in Matsuda's direction, and the poor man shrank back, mortally afraid for his life.

"Light! Watch your goddamn f*cking language!" L told him reproachfully. Soichirou looked completely scandalized to hear such language from a seven-year-old, even though the seemingly innocent little kid was really L… Actually, that only made it more disturbing.

"Well, I want to know why he kicked my butt for no apparent reason!" Light spluttered indignantly.

"Ah, but there's always a reason, ne?" L smirked suddenly.

Wordlessly, Aizawa reached out and peeled something from Light's back: a tiny slip of post-it note paper. The corners of his mouth twitched into a minute smile as he handed the note to Light.

It read: 'I'm Kira =P Kick my butt!" Light turned a dangerous shade of purple – one might call it puce – as he read it, and he turned slowly to L. Really, if looked could kill, L would have been being carted off to the cemetery already.

As it was, Light couldn't do anything to L. Instead, he said sarcastically: "Wow, that explanation really made me fell better. May I ask why you chose such a juvenile and immature prank?"

"I think you forget I _am_ actually a child, hence the immaturity." L's grin widened. "And that kick made _me_ feel much better. Thanks Matsuda!"

* * *

Rummaging through a storage box full of random, useless stuff in search of something that might help his next prank, Light happened to find a bag full of gigantic, creepily realistic spiders. About to toss it aside while idly wondering why the Kira Headquarters would have such weird stuff, he suddenly paused, hit by inspiration.

Two days ago, when he first met the new and improved version of L (or maybe not-so-improved since the L-kid was literally driving him crazy with his childish antics), he had challenged him to a game of Twenty Questions because he thought the child was an imposter. L had proved he wasn't and he originally decided that was that and didn't think about it anymore.

But now…

For fun and out of curiosity, he had asked: 'Do you have any completely irrational fears? You know, things that you know logically wouldn't hurt you, but you can't help but be afraid anyways?'

'Well, promise you won't tell anyone?' L had replied, looking exceptionally young and small. Light had nodded, interested. 'I'm terrified of all spiders, even if they are not poisonous. Especially those big ones; the bigger they are, the more scared I am.'

The spiders Light held in his hands were huge. Light looked at them for a second, and began to smile.

L, you're really in for it this time! Light thought silently, his face half hidden by shadows.

MUAHAHAHAHA!

Ten minutes and a casual trip to the bathroom later, everything was arranged. A wad of cotton had served quite nicely as a web, and now all he needed was for the fly to fly into the trap… Light waited patiently, occasionally drumming his fingers on the desk. For a while all was quiet, until L got up to go to the bathroom.

Light stopped drumming his fingers as he smirked in anticipation. Straining his ears, he decided that L should be discovering his not-so-pleasant surprises right… about…

_Now._

"EEEEEEEEEEEKK!" L screamed, right on cue. Simultaneously, the members of the Task Force turned their head in the direction of the shrill cry, perplexed and wondering what happened.

Revenge is so sweet, isn't it? Light asked himself smugly, satisfied.

* * *

_Squelch. _The unpleasant squishing sound was the first thing Light heard as he returned from retrieving a document and sat down in his seat. For a moment he froze with confusion, unsure as to why he heard a squelch when he sat down, but then his brain started to function again and put two and two together. The equation roughly went like this: L + prank = squelch in seat.

With a sinking feeling of dread, he noted that he had been wearing a newly-bought suit today, and that it's extremely difficult to get stains out of this kind of material. Goodbye, expensive suit, he told it sadly, mourning the loss of an outfit he had genuinely liked.

Rising slowly from his seat, Light touched his butt gingerly to assess the damage, careful not the press the bruise of Matsuda's kick accidentally. He felt something sticky and fluid. Syrup, most likely. He only got as far as that in his examination before a youthful voice interrupted him.

"Why is Light-kun touching himself?" L asked in his innocent voice, phrasing it delicately so that one's mind immediately fell to the gutter and yet no one doubted his naivety. How he made it so convincing, Light had no idea, but he knew the L-kid kid was anything _but_ innocent. Six pairs of eyes turned in his direction at L's comment, full of scandalized shock.

Light took his hands away from his ass hurriedly, but to his dismay, he wasn't fast enough. To the entire Task Force, he had been apparently caressing his butt, and, thanks to L's oh-so-innocent suggestion, they now have _very_ disturbing images and thoughts planted in their minds.

"Oh, Light, if you want to do that, you should use a vibrator! They work very well!" Matsuda told him, trying to be helpful.

That was so _not_ helpful. Light tried hard not to think of Matsuda's personal experience with vibrators, but he couldn't prevent an onslaught of permanently mind-scarring images. He shuddered. Besides, now Matsuda had basically just confirmed to the others that he was doing something… dirty.

"I am ashamed of you, Light." Soichirou remarked disappointedly, shaking his head. "I only found out recently that you read porn magazines, and now…" He paused to sigh. "There are innocent seven-year-olds in this room, you know."

That was too much. INNOCENT SEVEN-YEAR-OLDS? Did he even hear that correctly? He glanced at L's devious smirk and almost spontaneously combusted with indignation.

"HE DID IT!" Light hollered madly, foam gathering at the corners of his mouth, a trembling finger (from rage) pointed accusatorily at L. The child put on a façade of surprise and pointed at himself as if to say 'who, me?' "HE PUT SYRUP IN MY SEAT, AND I WAS ONLY CHECKING WHAT DAMAGE HE'D DONE! I SWEAR!"

"So now you're trying to blame this sweet adorable kid here? Very disappointing." Soichirou told him, completely won over by L's sorrowing, wide puppy eyes. "Go to your room and stay there for an hour, to reflect on your immature behavior."

"But – but – " Light protested, temporarily speechless from the injustice and irony of it all. HE was being punished for L's immature behavior?

"Don't argue. You're grounded for an hour." ordered Soichirou firmly.

"AH! Life is so unfair!" Light exclaimed, outraged. "You'll pay for this, you li'l bastard!" He shouted at the mischievous prankster.

The L-kid only grinned. The sneaky li'l bastard.

* * *

Light was not going to spend his hour idly, of course. In fact, as he coded down in his room, he realized that his father had inadvertently helped him by giving him time to prepare his next prank, without raising the suspicions of the Task Force.

He quickly got to work, gathering the necessary materials. Originally, he had considered putting a bucket of water on a door, but he decided now that is was too good for the li'l bastard. So he opted to used pudding instead. Just imagine, an entire bucketful of pudding falling on L's head… Light sighed in bliss.

Sneaking into the kitchen was easy work; the kitchen was far from the office, and no one was there because they were all working. Finding the pudding was not as easy: L was quite zealous about hiding his secret stashes of sweets and desserts.

But eventually, Light succeeded in locating the stash of pudding – it was hidden under the floor tiles, disturbingly close to where he had hidden the real sugar cubes.

Well, I guess that just proves the old proverb – great minds think alike, Light thought to himself. Even he had to admit he grudgingly admired L's intellect, for all his eccentric habits and childish antics.

Emptying out the pudding containers into a medium-sized bucket, Light was slightly exasperated, but unsurprised at the fact that there was the perfect amount of pudding to fill the bucket – in fact, he had counted on that to plan his prank. Figures, he mused, L is probably so immature all the time because he gets a sugar rush eating these.

Standing on a chair, Light balanced the bucket precariously on the kitchen door, in a position so that when the slightly open door was pushed, the person would get a nasty surprise.

Then he slipped through the crack without disturbing the door, bringing a tiny slice of cake on a Styrofoam plate and a long piece of string.

There was only the matter of luring L to the trap now. Light sneaked to the hallway outside the office and hid in the shadows. Dressed in dark colours, Light was virtually invisible. I'm a ninja! he thought, exhilarated, before he suddenly went 'wait, what?' That was probably the most immature though he'd ever had, and he blamed it on L's bad influence.

Quietly placing the slice of cake in the doorway, where L could see it, Light attached the string to the plate and waited. But before his plan could unfold, out came Matsuda, and as luck would have it, he stomped right into the cake.

_Squish_. And just like that, the cake was ruined. Light resisted the urge to growl his frustration as Matsuda looked at the squished cake, bewildered. Coming to no logical conclusions as to how the cake got there, he shrugged and picked up the cake to throw it into the nearest garbage.

Luckily, he didn't notice the string attached so Light wasn't discovered. Whistling, Matsuda continued on his way.

Ten minutes later, Light was back again with an identical piece of cake. He prayed that Matsuda wouldn't idiotically step on it again. Fortunately, this time his plan went smoothly. Once L caught sight off the cake (which didn't take long), all Light had to do was tug on it whenever L got close enough to grab it. L was so bent on getting the cake he didn't even seem to consider how the cake was moving by itself.

Piece of cake, Light thought smugly. In fact, in this context, the nonsensical expression actually made sense. Lured to the kitchen, L pushed the door open and –

SPLAT! L was now covered in pudding. Light abandoned his hiding place to come and laugh at L.

His laugh withered away, however, when he saw L's face. L was crying. Yes, crying, with huge droplets of tears pouring down his face.

Light's heart gave a guilty twinge. Was his prank too harsh? But it wasn't really, considering the wreck of his expensive suit, his very sore bottom, and his ruined pride from L's pranks. So why was L crying?

It was a pitiful sight. Light almost felt like crying himself as he gazed upon L's tears.

"Why are you crying?" Light asked uncomfortably.

"Y-you ruined a w-whole bucket of p-pudding!" L said through his tears. "A-and they were my f-favourite flavour t-too!

Light felt like banging his head against the nearest wall. So all his worry… was for a bucket of pudding?

"What do you want me to do then?" Light asked through gritted teeth.

"Buy me more pudding?" L asked pitifully, looking up at him through huge, sparkling puppy eyes.

Light tried to resist, but those adorable eyes were sucking away his willpower. "Okay, fine." He sighed in defeat.

"Yay!" L shrieked, his tears disappearing as soon at they had come. He went to change out of his pudding-stained clothes as Light tried to understand how his prank could have backfired on him like that… actually, how his entire world could have been turned upside-down when he met the mischievous L-kid.

As L walked out of the washroom, Light noticed his outfit had quite a different style from the usual shirt-n-jeans. In fact, he couldn't remember L wearing shirt-n-jeans ever since he was turned into a child. Even his pajamas style was different: they were now completely white and soft as opposed to the old casual sleepwear. Frowning, he decided to add this peculiar quirk to the 'eccentric habits of L' list, making a mental note to ask L about it later.

Walking to the store was a peaceful, quiet experience. Even L had settled down and ceased to bounce all over the place, to Light's relief. L led him to a particular convenience store, claiming that it sold the best pudding ever. Light suspected L had made quite a few rounds to all the candy stores of the area, hence his familiarity.

They had come for pudding only, but L kept piling stuff into Light's hands, including toys, candy, and even a rubber ducky. Light found out it was extremely hard to resist L's adorable puppy eyes, especially when he remembered guiltily how he had made L cry. And L only gave him cheeky grins when he tried to protest feebly.

At the corner of the convenience store, Light was slightly surprised to discover a pink and frilly dress, perfect for a child. The store apparently sold just about everything. Smirking evilly, he grabbed it when L wasn't looking and bought it hastily, then hid it in his jacket. He had plans involving L and the dress…

To his chagrin, by the time they left the store, he had several bags worth off toys and sweets, and a completely empty wallet.

But he didn't feel irritated at all; in fact, he was pleasantly surprised to discover he felt rather content as he walked back to the headquarters with L at his side.

Looking at L's happy smile and the youthful spring in his step, an answering smile crept onto Light's own face, unbidden.

Perhaps life with the adorable L-kid wasn't so bad after all, he mused, smiling.

**L: MUAHAHAHA… the prank war is not over yet! **

**Light: Ew! Why am I so sappy?**

**Eru-chan: The **_**'mind your goddamn f*cking language'**_** phrase was something one of my friends actually said to another friend… I found it hilarious and I just **_**had**_** to put it there XD. I hope my writing quality didn't diminish after so long! **

**L: And now for the bonus scene! **

**Eru-chan: I imagined Matsuda ruining Light's first prank, but decided against it because poor Light should at least score **_**some**_** victories. But this is what would've happened if L had asked Matsuda to get his tea and sugar instead of Aizawa: **

**Bonus Scene**

"Watari! Get me some tea, with sugar!" L called impatiently.

"I don't think Watari came today either." Aizawa spoke up hesitantly.

L frowned a bit and said with a discouraged pout: "Fine, Matsuda, you can get my tea and sugar instead."

"Okay!" Matsuda agreed cheerfully and ran off.

MUAHAHAHAHA! Light silently laughed. Now I'll get my revenge! I don't care if you're adorable – well, maybe I do – but you're still in for a rough day!

A few minutes later, with no sign of Matsuda's return, Light began to frown. Was it just because of his impatience, or is Matsuda taking an unexpectedly extra long time retrieving the food? After a long and tense pause, Matsuda finally ran back, out-of-breath but strangely victorious, with L's tea and a bag of sugar cubes clutched firmly in his hands.

"Sorry I took such a long time!" Matsuda huffed happily. "But I couldn't find the sugar cubes so I searched everywhere in the kitchen. Turns out they were under the kitchen floor tiles under the stove! That's kinda strange isn't it? Is that where you usually keep your sugar cubes, L?"

"No, I usually put them in the cupboards..." L trailed off, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"Oh! Really?" Matsuda exclaimed, smiling a bit guiltily. "I forgot to check there. But all that's well is well, right? Or however the saying goes... Anyways, at least I found it!"

"Hmm..." L murmured, staring at Light accusatorily, telling him with his eyes that he knew exactly what he had tried to do.

What kind of idiot would check under the kitchen tiles before checking in the cupboards when he's looking for something? Light fumed, pissed beyond belief at Matsuda for finding the real sugar cubes he'd hid instead of just grabbing the salt cubes he'd specifically placed in the cupboard, where L usually put his sugar cubes.

"Excuse me." Light said abruptly. "If you need me, I'll be out banging my head against the wall." He stood up and exitted the room to go out to the hallway.

L and Matsuda exchanged a mystified and confused look, as they heard a rythmic banging sound out in the hallway. _Thud. Thud. _The noise was almost hollow, and sounded just like... a head banging on the wall.

"I didn't know Light suffered from any mental infirmities." said Matsuda, bewildered.

"..." L really had no comment.

**The End**

**Eru-chan: LOL, don't we all have those moments where we honestly want to bang our heads against a wall? And the 'If you need me, I'll be out banging my head against the wall.' phrase was stolen from the Dilbert comic series... which I do NOT own... It's so perfect for the occasion, don't ya think?**

**Light: I'M NOT A PSYCHO!**

**L and Matsuda: YES YOU ARE!**

**Eru-chan: **_*sweatdrops*_** Reviews mean a lot to me! So if you care about my story, review! ^^ Bye for now! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Eru-chan: Hi minna-chan! XD Everyone's doing well? Sorry I was away so long, but my muse fled me for this chapter and I couldn't seem to get working on the story, plus homework, plus report cards, and all that annoying stuff. :(**

**Light: Stop making excuses. You were being lazy.**

**Eru-chan: **_*pouts*_** well I have it posted now! Anyways, this chapter is more like crack than romance, but our favourite couple can't seem to cooperate without a bit of tension, so... here ya go!**

**Light: Eru-chan doesn't own Deathnote, no matter how much she would like to.**

**Eru-chan: Meanie! **_*cries*_** Don't remind me of that! And as I am the author of this story, you have to call me Eru-sama... or maybe Eru-dono... **_*smirk*_

**Light: No. Way.**

**L: Eru-sama! Give me candy! **_*smiles*_

**Eru-chan: Yay! I love u, L!**

**Light: **_*impatiently*_** Yeah yeah, whatever, get to the story already!**

**Eru-chan: You big meanie! I'm gonna get L to annoy you so much!**

**Light: **_*sweatdrops*_

* * *

Pranking was an art. A fine, fine art, almost like sparring. I jab here, you jab there, and the game continues. But of course, Light and L were not going to play fair – nobody expects them to, anyways. Where's the fun in things if they followed the boring old rules? All the backhanded, dirty tricks were allowed here, because the sole purpose was to win.

So Light really couldn't blame L, he supposed. In fact, the only one at fault was really himself, for letting down his guard and relaxing around the happy-go-lucky, _evil_ child. And he really couldn't blame Matsuda, either, because he had unfortunately simply done the wrong thing at the wrong time.

Hell, karma has an evil sense of humor. Why did he have to smash so embarrassingly into a plate of spaghetti in front of the Task Force? He can never face them without blushing again, he was sure. They already had him branded as an insane psycho from his recent weird behavior, such as the syrup incident… And now they probably lost all respect for him, after this… Light wanted to sink through a hole in the ground and never be seen again.

He really couldn't believe he'd fallen for such a basic trick. Fallen, quite literally. As in teeth hitting hard floor painfully. Or rather, Matsuda's spaghetti instead of the floor, which was not much of a consolation, considering.

A while earlier, when they'd returned from their crazed candy-shopping spree (L buying and Light paying), Light had excused himself to go to the bathroom. "Okay." L had cheerfully agreed, and Light never suspected anything wrong…nor had he seen the devious glint in the L-kid's eyes…

A grave mistake, as it turned out. When he returned from his bathroom trip, he had unwittingly walked straight into the trap, that simple, ingenious trap – a tripwire. That was all; a tripwire across the door that L had hastily set up in the time he was in the bathroom.

SPLAT! His face went straight into Matsuda's noodles placed at exactly the right spot… or the wrong spot, one could argue. How Matsuda could be so idiotically accident-prone, and managed to work his way into the middle of any disaster, Light would never know. Climbing back up, his face covered in dripping red tomato sauce, he'd glared right into L's triumphant, gloating grin.

"Bonus!" L had crowed, punching his fist into the air victoriously.

And so this was why L deserved the worst punishment Light could give him now.

An utterly horrible punishment.

The worst he could think of.

The very, very worst.

_Stealing his candy. _

Okay, so perhaps it's not the most dramatic plan ever, but Light knew it would be effective, after watching L's reaction after the pudding prank. And this time, his tears be damned, Light was not going to fell sorry for him, not at all. He planned to go even further than just stealing his candy. No, he planned to dangle a piece of STRAWBERRY candy in front of L, just out of reach.

And then eat it slowly, lick after lick.

Light shivered in delighted anticipation, I'd better get busy, putting the first step of the masterprank in effect, he thought, rubbing his hands in preparation. And when I'm done, L will wish he'd never messed with me!

But, strangely, even as he started searching the kitchen thoroughly for L's stashes of dessert in revenge, there was no venom in Light's purpose. There was none of the usual desire to win pushing him ahead relentlessly, dictating his actions and fuelling his thoughts dangerously. In fact, the prank war was only a rather childish game entertaining the geniuses and keeping the boredom at bay. Light found he enjoyed it sincerely, quite a bit in fact, and that was quite rare for Light.

There was just something about the hyperactive child that made Light drop his guard subconsciously and become at ease to truly feel –

Happiness. Yes, true happiness, not shallow temporary pleasure or interest. Perhaps the reason Light found himself so drawn to the L-kid was his unique ability to make him feel comfortable and content. In L's company, he could almost forget his troubles and worries and become free. And subconsciously, without realizing it, Light had formed a bond with the L-kid – a bond that had no name.

It was not love, and yet not quite friendship, for an undercurrent of grim knowledge ran through their carefree plays. Light could not forget that L was the one who accused him of being Kira; while L could not forget that Light _was_ Kira.

And yet, despite all this, they'd managed to laugh, and smile and enjoy, and be happy. Their relationship was complex, entangled in a fragile web of lies and deceit they'd built themselves, ready to collapse any second at a mere touch. But for now it was enough to live in the moment, and pretend to forget, in order to nourish that delicate bond that had grown between them.

Light smiled, a genuine smile that lit up his face and seemed to radiate from his soul. For now, he was happy.

Of course, that did not mean Light was going to let L off easy. Oh no, no way. L deserves every second of the agony coming towards him. So that's why, after two full hours of searching, Light had found every single stash of candy in the entire headquarters, and thrown them out. The cake was gone; he gleefully threw out the sugar cubes; the cookies went too – none of L's sweet snacks survived the massacre.

Wait, what's this? He pulled out a well-concealed bag of candy he'd almost missed. _Almost_ being the word, because as an off-the-chart genius, he would not be outsmarted. No, not even by the world's three most famous detectives, L. So he laboriously dragged the small package out from a trapdoor hidden below a closet, protected by a 5-digit code. Which he had promptly cracked, of course: being the genius he was, it had taken less than a minute. The world record for cracking 5-digit codes was 17 minutes 26 seconds, but Light was not going to bother trying for the world record. He had more important things to do. Such as stealing a seven-year-old's candy? His mind asked him shrewdly. To which he replied, quite eloquently, "Shut up."

He inspected the package closely, noting that they pieces of candy were all strawberry flavoured. On one side of the bag, EMERGENCY STASH was written. A slow smirk spread across Light's face as he carefully stashed his prize in his pocket. _Perfect. _

* * *

Light's efforts weren't wasted. Barely 10 minutes had past before a hysterical L stumbled out from the kitchen, screaming and generally looking demented, with his wide panda eyes even wider than normal in his panic.

Light winced as he covered his ears. At least he was prepared for this reaction though, and had earplugs ready - he really knew L quite well. The other members of the Task Force weren't as fortunate and were writhing on the floor in pain while trying to protect their damaged eardrums. Absently, Light wondered how such a small person can emit such a loud sound - but oh well, that's L. Always defying expectations.

"W-what's w-wrong, L-kun?" Matsuda managed to stutter over the high-pitched noise, his face arranged in a rather monstrous distortion as he simultaneously tried to cover his ears, find earplugs, phone the police, run out the room, and do the pirouette. ...Actually, no one knows why exactly he's trying to do the pirouette as L screams, least of all Matsuda himself. Light had a half-formed theory that Matsuda's ..._unique _mind somehow mistook the scream as music and automatically ordered Matsuda to dance... or maybe he was just crazy.

This entire headquarters resembled a madhouse at the moment, with L leading the asylum and Matsuda being cheerfully insane, and Light wondered why he was here in the first place. Perhaps it was just a strange nightmare that he would wake up from any moment. _Ah, but you fit snugly into the insane category_, a voice in his head told him snidely.

"I'm not crazy!" Light argued heatedly. _But you hear and talk to voices in your head... _the voice replied, accompanied by something seeming suspiciously like a smirk. Light thought about this, and deciding that it did make sense, he promptly resigned himself to his fate.

Wait, his fate was to be screamed at by a hysterical seven-year-old who was currently holding him prisoner? _Don't think about it,_ he told himself. That way is the road to insanity.

"L," He began delicately, or as delicately as possible while trying to be heard above the glass-shattering wail. "I suggest you calm down and tell us what the matter is." He asked, keeping a straight face.

L had to take several gulps before he gathered himself enough to reply. "M-my c-cand-dy!" He wailed, panicked. "Th-they're g-gone!"

"So" asked Aizawa, who had just picked picked himself up from the floor from where he was curled in the fetal position a few moments ago. He dusted himself off and adopted a rather annoyed expression at being subjected to all this drama. His practical, sensible mind failed to see why L was making such a big fuss over _candy,_ of all things. He thought rather crossly that L needed to get his priorities straight - he never even bats an eye looking at the list of murders that Kira has commited, but is reduced to a sobbing mess when his candy is missing?

"But I can't function without my sugar!" L yelled, distressed. "In ten minutes without sugar I will DIE!" Light sniggered, privately thinking that this was actually very likely, considering it's _L_.

Soichirou looked completely bewildered. "If it's candy you want, we'll make a quick trip to the candy store - " he tried to placate his seven-year-old boss.

"No, you don't UNDERSTAND! I can't last that long without sugar! I need sugar NOW!" L looked completely frenzied, wildly gesturing with his arms. Light watched, entranced. This was better than he had expected. It was like watching a real-life soap opera!

But so thoroughly immersed in the wild scene before him, Light was unprepared as L lunged savagely at him. "You!" The kid growled menacingly. "You have my candy, I know it!"

Light choked and tried to stop L from throttling him, but the seven-year-old was surprisingly stronger than one would expect from his wiry frame. "I-I don't h-have your candy!" He choked out, slowly turning red and sputtering as L continue to exercise his grip on his neck.

Soichirou looked positively alarmed and at a complete loss as to what to do... this type of situation was never really included in his police guidebook. "Now, now." He muttered weakly. "Everyone calm down now, and L, you'd better let go of Light before he suffocates to death..."

"The world will be a better place without Kira!" L shouted. "And this proves it! Light is Kira! You see! He tried to deprive me of candy! He is 100% Kira!"

Aizawa rolled his eyes. "Actually, doesn't this prove that YOU have more homicidal tendencies than Light? After all, I don't see Light trying to kill YOU, only the other way around."

Matsuda frowned as he considered this. And as a some difficulty, his eyebrows finally uncreased as he reached a conclusion. "Wow... it actually makes sense! Amazing!" He clapped with joy, seemingly forgetting the homicide happening right in front of him.

"Uh... s-some h-help here?" Light finally managed to choke out through L's iron grip. Mogi, silent as always, stepped forward without a word and lifted L easily away from Light. The teen gasped with relief and massaged his sore throat, frantically gulping air. L struggled in vain in Mogi's grip, unable to free himself.

Light savoured the surreal and comical moment, letting every detail sink into his mind so he can remember it and have a quiet laugh some other day. But for now, he had a plan to carry out... the best part hadn't even arrived yet. He just needed L to catch sight of a certain brightly-coloured, strawberry flavoured candy pack with "EMERGENCY" written on it, placed strategically and tantalizingly under that aged oak tree outside... And this shouldn't take long for L, because again, it's _L._ Pretty self-explanatory.

Sure enough, L ceased struggling the next moment as his keen bright eyes caught sight of a glimpse of colour outside... something that looks suspiciously like...

"CANDY!" He exclaimed with such excitement that Mogi, who was never surprised by anything, was startled into dropping him. Without any ado. L bulldozed right past all the Task Force members like a crazed... seven-year-old (nothing else seems to compare to a hyper kid who wants his sugar... ), leaving behind six very bewildered adults and a strangely triumphant teen.

The teen in question, though, hid his glee well under a mask of righteous concern. "Everyone, don't worry, I have been assigned the duty of caretaker and I will take responsibility for L now." He stated calmly. "You can continue working on the tasks that need to be completely... I'm sure L, in his right mind, wouldn't want the Kira case to fall behind just because of a petty incident like this."

Soichirou breathed a sigh of relief, happy that someone is willing to provide sense to their topsy-turvy world, turned upside-down and loopy since the arrival of L. "Thank you, son." He said gratefully. "We'll just leave this up to you. I trust you'll take care of L." With that, he motioned to the others to join him in returning to his work.

Light turned away to hide his diabolical grin. Take care of L? Oh yes, that, he'll surely do... with pleasure. With a cheerful whistled tune, he waved to his dad to reassure him of his competence and exitted the headquarters at a comfortable speed to go find L. He turned some figures over in his head, did some calculations, and concluded his awesome, ingenious trap had probably already ensnared L already. That thought made him smile. Revenge was sweet.

Just as he thought, L was dangling comically by one leg from the previously mentioned oak tree, swinging and yet still desperately reaching - or rather, trying and failing to - for the sweets bag.

Light couldn't stop a laugh from escaping, and immediately wished he had thought to bring a camera. No one will be able to take the genius seriously after seeing this, he was sure.

"So." Light sauntered up to L nonchalantly. "What's _up_?" He placed a subtle emphasis on the word 'up', just enough so L can hear the pointed barb at his current predicament.

L looked up, with his pitiful puppy eyes ready and brimming with tears. Fortunately, Light was prepared for this approach and put on a mocking expression in defense, not falling for L's trick. He raised a finger to stop L's act. "Before you even start, I'm going to warn you that I'm not going to fall for it." He said seriously matter-of-factly. L regarded him with a shrewd expression, as if judging his resolve, but upon finally deciding that Light was serious, he abandoned his act.

"Good." Light said with some satisfaction, pleased that he could finally get back at L. "Do you have anything else to say?" He prompted, convinced he finally has the upper hand in this situation. He was therefore disturbed when he saw the characteristic trace of a devious smirk flitting about L's lips before disappearing. Uh oh. That expression means that L is plotting and up to no good...

L adopted a cynical air and looked up again with narrowed eyes at his captor. He seemed to have regained his uninterested calm, despite his rather problematic situation. "Yeah, I only have one thing to say." Light had a bad feeling about this... "... I didn't know you were into bondage... or such a pedophile, for that matter..."

Light screamed with frustration. How did L managed to twist everything he did like this? L laughed happily, swinging amusedly back and forth.

Back at the Headquarters, everyone's head turned simultaneously towards the the direction from where Light's scream and L's laughter was coming from. "I wonder what's going on..." Matsuda mused aloud.

"I think we'd be better off not knowing." Soichirou said decidely.

Aizawa just snorted with disgust. "Kids these days..." he sighed, shaking his head.

* * *

**Eru-chan: Originally this was only about a third of the chapter (scary thought) but it was WAY too long, so I had to cut it short...**

**L: Review please! Eru-sama and I will be so happy! ***starry eyes*

**Light: I'm not a pervert! It's NOT bondage! Argh!**

**Eru-chan and L: Tee-hee! XD**

**Eru-chan: Next chappy featuring: the neverending song, the barney theme song, and more! Don't miss it! XD**


End file.
